What To Do When Children Fight

Question: When we are home and my sons have time together they’re fighting a lot. What should I do? How much, or when, should I interfere with their arguments with each other?

Sat: Oh my gosh, I had two boys. They don't really fight, that’s just how two boys are together. You know what I told My son, who also has two boys … he used to immediately interfere because it was so disturbing, and I totally agree that it's so disturbing. If they were arguing, I told him to stay out of it and remove himself if he doesn't like it. Go someplace else and let them figure it out. Let them take it to the end and see what their experience is. In this case, because I watched the kids, I saw so much interference from the parents. “Come on, don't do that. Come on. Back off. Whose fault is it? You go to your room. You are right..” I told him, let them figure it out. Let them hit each other, whatever they wanna do … let them figure it out. When they figure it out, somehow it ends much better. But that was in that case.

First of all, I wanna say to that mother that if you have two boys, this is what your home is gonna look like. But at the same time, if you can, separate them. Give them different things to play with, different games or different activities outside, so they are not together all the time. Maybe the father should take one child and the mother should take the other child to give them quality time. Try not to put them together 24/7. I mean, this could happen to a husband and wife if they are together 24/7, there would be more conflict. So I would say, subtly have activity with one at a time, or things like this. I don't know any other way. If they're two boys together, they're gonna have fights. That's the nature of it.

Parenting Chat
August 19, 2023