What Behaviors Absolutely Require Discipline?

Question: What behaviors absolutely require discipline and are not okay? We know lying is one, what are others? We would love effective examples of discipline, esp. for children going from elementary into middle school and for high schoolers.

Sat: Rudeness, meanness. And even with lying, it's not so much a discipline that is needed - it’s sitting them down and saying, “When you don’t tell the truth.” That's what I did [with] one of My grandchildren, just about three weeks ago, I said, “Then, even when you tell the truth, no one will believe you, and you are going to be in a predicament. So keep your lying very low key and [do it only] when you really, really have to.” Because they will anyway and not use it. But if we say, “Don't ever lie …” Who says that? Even parents lie if they have to. So, again, each child is different. But I would say when a child is mean and not only to the parents, [or] uses foul language if they are small. And if they are teenagers and up, if they are having wrong friends, definitely take them away at that age. Each age is different.

But then we come back to our first question and answer, which is, in every age, put yourself in that age and give it understanding. That's the best approach that I know of, to really know where his anger is coming from, or her anger is coming from, or her resentment is coming from. When they're older, I'm talking about, and then intuitively, do something or don't do anything. Sometimes not doing anything is the remedy for most cases with boys, just letting it pass by.

Parenting Chat
August 23, 2025