Discipline for Kids Duties?
In this audio excerpt from a conference call on parenting, Sat discusses how to help children perform their duties.
Kavi: I have a question my dear Sat, I believe that there are some things that children have to do, such as brush their teeth, take showers, go to school, do their homework, etc. Assuming this is true, how do you explain to kids that they have some duties that they have to do and force this expectation without drawing on their canvas?
Sat: Well, I don’t think an explanation is even necessary, as long as we have a body, we do have to do that and we need to have rules in the house and all the occupants in the house have to go by that. The easiest explanation if it is even necessary is if a child asks, you brush your teeth so you [your teeth] won’t hurt, you take a shower so you don’t smell (laughs). But there are things that the body has to do that have nothing to do with the canvas. The things that we have to be watchful of with the canvas are the impressions the child picks up that are dramatic or create fear and tightness in them. In other words, if we transfer our own cautiousness through memory of fear to them unnecessarily, we are giving them the same impression that we picked up and had to suffer through.
But in an ordinary day to day life, I don’t think that an explanation is even necessary, because the child knows it has a body and needs to do things that are necessary for the body.
Kavi: If I could just ask a follow up question, how important is it to teach them to give quality and effort to their endeavors, whatever they are working on, as silly as brushing their teeth or doing their schoolwork. If it is important, how do you explain the importance of quality to a child?
Sat: You keep saying “quality” and I think “quality” is very hard for a child to understand. You can say, “You give your all to this moment and the next moment you get to play … when you brush your teeth, you are going to be spending the time anyway, so you might as well do a good job … etc.” Do not be afraid at all to discipline and tell your child what is good for them. But sometimes when we repeat it, they become deaf towards it. At that point, just change your ways to communicate with them; don’t go with the same sentence, with the same reasoning, the same thing, etc. If they have homework, they need to sit down and have the discipline to finish it.
But remember also that each child’s expansion of their concentration is different, so you work with what you have, not comparing [them] to the best student in the classroom. So, we give them space but at the same time they need to know that these are the things that they need to do.
Kavi: Thank you Sat.
Discipline for Kids Duties
June 25, 2022